Monday, February 20 - 1:07 PM - N Claremont (just north of St. Mathias school)
Another week, another creepo van creeping through the streets of our fair city. Note the multiple ladders tied to the roof. That's gotta be 80-100 feet of ladders! Did the ladders come with the van? Were they used to entice potential buyers when this baby was posted on Craigslist for $250? Perhaps they were lashed to the roof to prevent it from flying off when it reaches its top speed of 43 mph while rumbling down Western Avenue.
No, we know the true purpose of those ladders. They are for climbing up to the top floors of apartment buildings to sneak in through unlocked windows and pluck your children out of their beds at night while they slumber and dream of candy cane kisses and sugar plum sassafrass.
Be vigilant, children of Chicago!
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